


It's not pretty there

by Cirkne



Series: Breaking Glass [9]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Gen, Suicidal Yamaguchi, depressed Yamaguchi, sad yamaguchi, suicide viewed as an option here so look out for that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-17
Updated: 2014-09-17
Packaged: 2018-02-17 19:17:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2320448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cirkne/pseuds/Cirkne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's one of the bad days again and this time it comes in frustration</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's not pretty there

**Author's Note:**

> I intended to make this a lot sadder than it turned out to be but a thing happened today and I couldn't. 
> 
> If I go with my original plan the next part will also be pretty dark. 
> 
> Title from Dark Side by Kelly Clarkson

He starts missing school. At first it's small, he fakes a headache once or twice, lays in bed and says he feels sick. Yamaguchi starts doing it more until people get used to it and his homeroom teacher asks what's happening. After that he starts going every day again. 

When after two months of perfect attendance he skips again, the first to react is Tsukishima. 'Again?' he texts without anything else, just a single word. Yamaguchi doesn't answer, puts his phone under the pillow and closes his eyes. More messages come but he doesn't read them. 

Tadashi walks around the house for no reason, lays down on the kitchen floor and cries until it gets hard to breathe. Goes into his mother's room and curls up on the bed. He hasn't been in there for so long everything feels different. The sheets have just been washed and they still smell like fabric softener, he drowns himself in the scent and cries again.

He's still in his night clothes when the door bell rings. Yamaguchi considers not opening but it rings again and again until he just has to. The one behind the door is Kei and he storms in without so much as a greeting.

"What do you want?" Tadashi asks, his voice hoarse from crying.

Tsukishima doesn't answer, rushes into the boy's room, Yamaguchi follows behind and stops in the doorway, watches his best friend look for his cellphone.

He only turns to Tadashi when he finds it. "Seventeen messages" he says showing the phone to him. "You couldn't answer a single one?" his voice angry he sighs, throws the phone back on the bed.

"What do you want?" the smaller repeats, doesn't move from where he's standing.

"You're supposed to answer me" Tsukki groans "I'm your best friend."

"You sure as hell don't act like one" is the answer. It's quiet, takes Kei a moment to answer.

"What do you-"

"You don't act like one!" Yamaguchi says. Louder, tears filling his eyes. "Do you know what they all think? They think I'm following you and you just can't get rid of me. No one" he looks up, tears streaming down his face now "no one thinks you care about me."

"Yamaguchi- I-"

"Leave me alone"

"Tadashi-"

"Don't use my first name!" he turns and goes to the kitchen. "Leave me the fuck alone" Yamaguchi says loud enough for Tsukishima to hear but it's not really for him. It echoes in his mind, makes his chest hurt.

When Kei leaves Tadashi goes to the bathroom, finds the bleach they use for dyeing hair and opens the bottle. He takes in the smell, lets his head feel dizzy and his eyes fill up with tears. He allows himself a minute of weakness, imagines drowning in bleach, pours some on his hand. Then his mind goes to his mother finding him dead and he washes it off, closes the bottle and puts it back. 

Tsukki texts him at three in the morning. 'Sorry' the message reads, Yamaguchi figures he should apologize too but leaves it for morning when he can pretend he's fine, when it stops hurting, when the bite marks all over his hands have faded.


End file.
